Quotes about Beer

Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world. Votes: 5

He was a wise man who invented beer. Votes: 4

God has a brown voice, as soft and full as beer. Votes: 4

Milk is for babies. When you grow up you have to drink beer. Votes: 4

I have respect for beer. Votes: 3

Beer soothes the upset soul. Votes: 3

Beer is prose. Wine is poetry. Votes: 3

Beer ... a high and mighty liquor. Votes: 3

Beer. Now there's a temporary solution. Votes: 3

Beer is proof that God loves us. Votes: 3

I recommend...bread, meat, vegetables, and beer. Votes: 3

Beer is an improvement on water itself. Votes: 3

We are the Draft Beer Preservation Society. Votes: 3

Beer is made by men, wine by God. Votes: 3

Beer and Rugby are more or less synonymous. Votes: 3

Beer drinking doesn't do half the harm of lovemaking. Votes: 3

Beer is a wholesome liquor.....it abounds with nourishment Votes: 3

Beer: Helping ugly people have sex since 3000 B. C. Votes: 3

I'm gaining weight the right way: I'm drinking beer. Votes: 3

Beer's intellectual. What a shame so many idiots drink it. Votes: 3

Beer is proof that God wants us to be happy Votes: 3

Beer is amazing. Nutritional. Medicinal. A beverage, but also a meal. Votes: 3

British Beatitudes! ... Beer, beef, business, bibles, bulldogs, battleships, buggery and bishops. Votes: 3

Beer may cause you to digress - and lead a happier life. Votes: 3

Beer was not made to be moralized about, but to be drunk. Votes: 3

Note, that yeast of good Beer, is better then that of Ale. Votes: 3

Beer makes you feel the way you ought to feel without beer. Votes: 3

Many battles have been fought and won by soldiers nourished on beer. Votes: 3

The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind. Votes: 3

The letters in 'Brace Beemer' can be arranged to spell 'Embrace Beer.' Votes: 3

Beer is the Danish national drink, and the Danish national weakness is another beer. Votes: 3

Beer, if drank with moderation, softens the temper, cheers the spirit, and promotes health. Votes: 3

Beer, of course, is actually a depressant, but poor people will never stop hoping otherwise. Votes: 3

Some people wanted champagne and caviar when they should have had beer and hot dogs. Votes: 3

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is Freedom, in water there is bacteria. Votes: 3

Be wary of strong drink. It can make you shoot at tax collectors... and miss. Votes: 3

An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools. Votes: 3

Drop Pants, Not Bombs. Break Dance, Not Hearts. Draft Beer, Not People. Make LOVE, Not WAR. Votes: 3

All men hear is blah, blah, blah, blah, SEX, blah, blah, blah, FOOD, blah, blah, blah, BEER. Votes: 3

Beer is God's way of telling us that he loves us and wants us to be happy. Votes: 3

Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut. Votes: 3

Beer dulls a memory, brand sets it burning, but wine is the best for a sore heart's yearning. Votes: 3

Beer is not a good cocktail-party drink, especially in a home where you don't know where the bathroom is. Votes: 3

Give my people plenty of beer, good beer, and cheap beer, and you will have no revolution among them. Votes: 3

We old folks have to find our cushions and pillows in our tankards. Strong beer is the milk of the old. Votes: 3

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading: Henny Youngman. He was a wise man who invented beer Votes: 3

You can do anything with beer that you can do with wine. Beer is great for basting or marinating meat and fish. Votes: 3

You know I love pot, and I love beer, but I am totally sober, just because it completely stopped working for me. Votes: 3

Beer does not taste like itself unless it is chasing a dram of neat whisky down the gullet - preferably two drams Votes: 3

Beer does not make itself properly by itself. It takes an element of mystery and of things that no one can understand. Votes: 3

Beer is sacred business, a mood-altering food substance that may have preserved the human species. To drink beer is to be human. Votes: 3

Beer bottles, whiskey bottles, brown glass, green. They fell to the lawn and I'd feel serene. Adam was king to my stilted queen. Votes: 3

Avoid alcohol as you would a loathsome disease. Beer will do to you what hard liquor will do. Each contains alcohol in varying amounts. Votes: 3

I'm an old-fashioned guy... I want to be an old man with a beer belly sitting on a porch, looking at a lake or something. Votes: 3

Beer. It always seems like such a good idea at the time, doesn't it? What's worse is beer seems like an even better idea after you've had some beer. Votes: 3

The fact that a believer is happier than a skeptic is no more to the point than the fact that a drunken man is happier than a sober one. Votes: 3

If you ever need a helping hand, you'll find one at the end of your arm. Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants to see us happy. Votes: 3

He that drinks fast, pays slow. Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. There can't be good living where there is not good drinking. Votes: 3

I don't go to the gym or practice yoga. And the closest thing I have to a nutritionist is the Carlsberg Beer Company. I just have the appetite of a pigeon. Votes: 3

Fortunately the boat we rented had a motor in it You will definitely want this feature on your sailboat too, because if you put up the sails, the boat tips way over, and you could spill your beer. Votes: 3

That's the problem with drinking, I thought, as I poured myself a drink. If something bad happens you drink in an attempt to forget; if something good happens you drink in order to celebrate; and if nothing happens you drink to make something happen. Votes: 3

mmmmmmm. donuts/beer/erotic cakes. Votes: 1

Oh yeah drugs, ya gotta have drugs. Votes: 1

They who drink beer will think beer. Votes: 1

You can never buy beer, you just rent it. Votes: 1

The government will fall that raises the price of beer. Votes: 1

I'm gonna drink lots of beer and stay out all night. Votes: 1

My playground is full of moonshine, mason jars, beer bottles, and bonfires. Votes: 1

Put it back in the horse! [on tasting his first American beer]. Votes: 1

Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world. Votes: 1

I look like the kind of guy who has a bottle of beer in my hand. Votes: 1

There is no such thing as a bad beer. It's that some taste better than others. Votes: 1

Their marketing strategy had to be changed to the young people. That's who buys the beer. Votes: 1

Give a man a beer, waste an hour. Teach a man to brew, and waste a lifetime! Votes: 1

She came onto him like a slow movin' cold front -- His beer was warmer than the look in her eyes. Votes: 1

I was an anorexic, beer drinking, class cutting, doodling, shoplifting, skater chick that was into nature, art class, and the beach. Votes: 1

I have always wanted to open up a brewery slash goat farm. Brew some beer, make some goat cheese, but that's kinda dreamy. Votes: 1

Europeans are much more serious than we are in America because they think that a good place to discuss intellectual matters is a beer party. Votes: 1

In my opinion, most of the great men of the past were only there for the beer - the wealth, prestige and grandeur that went with the power. Votes: 1

Rugby is great. The players don't wear helmets or padding; they just beat the living daylights out of each other and then go for a beer. I love that. Votes: 1

My father was a preacher in Maryland and we had crab feasts - with corn on the cob, but no beer, being Methodist - outside on the church lawn. Votes: 1

The big compliment came from the beer drinkers who didn't know me. They wouldn't drink or move when I sang. If they had their glasses in mid-air, the glasses wouldn't come down. Votes: 1

Really hairy backs on men turn me off. I'm not into the ape thing at all. Or beer bellies and flabby arms, either. Also, one random nose hair which is longer than the others... that's gross. Votes: 1

You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline. It helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer. Votes: 1

I never had one beer. If I bought a six-pack of beer, I kept drinking till all six beers were gone. You have to have that kind of understanding about yourself. I haven't had a drink now in 12 years. Votes: 1

When I get a chance to play golf or go on a boat with good people, take the boat out and put some lobsters on the grill, get the ice-cold beer and the cigars - that's heaven here on earth. Votes: 1

I definitely feel closer to the feminine side of the human being than I do the male - or the American idea of what a male is supposed to be. Just watch a beer commercial and you'll see what I mean. Votes: 1

For the second straight year, craft beer is the fastest growing segment of the U.S. alcoholic beverage industry. In 2005, craft beer experienced a 9 percent increase in volume, nearly triple that of the growth experienced in the wine and spirits industry. Votes: 1

Filled with mingled cream and amber I will drain that glass again. Such hilarious visions clamber Through the chambers of my brain -- Quaintest thoughts -- queerest fancies Come to life and fade away; Who cares how time advances? I am drinking ale today Votes: 1

There are those who love to get dirty and fix things. They drink coffee at dawn, beer after work. And those who stay clean, just appreciate things. At breakfast they have milk and juice at night. There are those who do both, they drink tea. Votes: 1

The difference between the Parthenon and the World Trade Center, between a French wine glass and a German beer mug, between Bach and John Philip Sousa, between Sophocles and Shakespeare, between a bicycle and a horse, though explicable by historical moment, necessity, and destiny, is before all a difference of imagination. Votes: 1

And what makes me happy now has changed as well... Its one thing to play in a bar or at a biker festival, and hear a guy who's been drinking beer all day come up and tell you how good you are. For a long time in your life that will make you happy. Votes: 1

All my friends were in college when I was making 'Superbad.' We were drinking beer and watching movies and eating pizza. It wasn't like I was going to nice restaurants or anything like that, and I lived like a frat guy. Eventually it was time to grow up, be healthy and be responsible. You can't live like a kid forever, you know? Votes: 1

...beer makes people deaf... Votes: 0

Draft beer, not people. Votes: 0

Think beer; drink beer. Votes: 0

Cold beer is bottled God. Votes: 0

My people must drink beer. Votes: 0

I work until beer o'clock. Votes: 0

I have a beer belly. Votes: 0

Good people drink good beer. Votes: 0

That questionable superfluity small beer. Votes: 0

I've never, ever tasted beer. Votes: 0

Life ain't all beer and skittles. Votes: 0

Religions change; beer and wine remain. Votes: 0

Homer no function beer well without. Votes: 0

He that drinks beer, thinks beer. Votes: 0

Life isn't all beer and skittles. Votes: 0

Wine is like beer except different. Votes: 0

Life's not all beer and skittles Votes: 0

Payday came and with it beer Votes: 0

Never ask for 'a beer.' Votes: 0

I'm a big root beer guy. Votes: 0

Next to music beer was best. Votes: 0

Cerevisiam Bibat! (drink beer for health) Votes: 0

Next to music, beer was best. Votes: 0

Demagogue--a vessel containing beer and other liquids. Votes: 0

If she drinks beer, she's a keeper. Votes: 0

The beer tastes better when you win Votes: 0

Let no man thirst for good beer. Votes: 0

Ah, yes. I remember my first beer. Votes: 0

Hormones are nature's three bottles of beer. Votes: 0

Always store beer in a dark place. Votes: 0

I'll have another beer. I'm not driving. Votes: 0

How much beer is in German intelligence? Votes: 0

Oh,Elizabeth, your justice would freeze beer. Votes: 0

The saxophone is the embodied spirit of beer. Votes: 0

Genesee beer. The great outdoors in a glass. Votes: 0

Think 'free speech,' not 'free beer.' Votes: 0

A man who lies about beer makes enemies. Votes: 0

A theater without beer is just a museum Votes: 0

There is no strong beer, just weak men Votes: 0

I cannot stand beer. But I love wine. Votes: 0

Gimme a pigfoot and a bottle of beer. Votes: 0

A little bit of beer is divine medicine. Votes: 0

Books and beer are the best and worst defense. Votes: 0

I drink no cider, but feast on Philadelphia beer. Votes: 0

[...] beer results in ideas, which results in new code. Votes: 0

I'm only a beer teetotaller, not a champagne teetotaller. Votes: 0

Money can't buy happiness"”but it can buy beer. Votes: 0

No TV and no beer makes Homer something something. Votes: 0

Does anybody have, a cold beer for Steve Austin?!??!!? Votes: 0

Gin for executions, beer for birthdays, wine for weddings. Votes: 0

it sucks to get old...but there's always beer Votes: 0

Mike Hammer drinks beer because I can't spell Cognac. Votes: 0

I'd give a hundred dollars for a cold beer. Votes: 0

What's a punk band? Hey, who's got a beer? Votes: 0

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. Votes: 0

My first commercial was for Miller High Life beer. Votes: 0

I will veto every single beer, um, bill with earmarks. Votes: 0

I like to eat crawfish and drink beer. That's despair? Votes: 0

On victory, you deserve beer. On defeat, you need it. Votes: 0

Should I really care what kind of beer frogs recommend? Votes: 0

Everybody thinks I drink beer but I actually like cider! Votes: 0

I don't think I've drunk enough beer to understand that. Votes: 0

Whiskey just naturally likes me but beer likes me better. Votes: 0

Everybody's old enough for a beer, ain't that right, Mule? Votes: 0

What two ideas are more inseparable than beer and Britannia? Votes: 0

We discussed this very important issue yesterday over a beer. Votes: 0

That's right, there's free beer in Irish paradise. Everyone's jealous. Votes: 0

I love football and beer and have a normal girlfriend. Votes: 0

Men are nicotine soaked, beer besmirched, whiskey greased, red-eyed devils. Votes: 0

I would think beer and football go hand in hand. Votes: 0

Not one man in a beer commercial has a beerbelly. Votes: 0

And I will make it felony to drink small beer. Votes: 0

God is great, beer is good, and people are crazy. Votes: 0

I usually need a can of beer to prime me. Votes: 0

I am very picky about my people and my beer. Votes: 0

If you don't know what else to do, drink beer. Votes: 0

I like a good beer buzz early in the morning. Votes: 0

See, there's a fat guy doing okay. Bring me another beer. Votes: 0

Ah, beer, my one weakness. My Achille's heel, if you will. Votes: 0

I would rather commit adultery than drink a glass of beer. Votes: 0

I'm a meat girl and I just love having a beer. Votes: 0

I never drank anything stronger than beer before I was twelve. Votes: 0

That wine drinking is more effete than beer drinking? No question. Votes: 0

I'm sure it's nothing switching to a light beer won't cure. Votes: 0

Drink beer, smoke dope, and eat pussy until your jaw breaks Votes: 0

I think this would be a good time for a beer. Votes: 0

He changed more times than a baby in a beer-drinking contest. Votes: 0

Anyone can drink beer, but it takes intelligence to enjoy beer. Votes: 0

stay with the beer. beer is continuous blood. a continuous lover. Votes: 0

Nothing says "deeply in mourning" like canapés and free beer. Votes: 0

Milk are for babies, when you get older you drink beer. Votes: 0

I'd give my goddamned soul for just a glass of beer. Votes: 0

No beer before 5 p.m., wait... did I just say that? Votes: 0

You can't be a real country unless you have a beer. Votes: 0

Across the troubled maelstrom of time, people always need a beer. Votes: 0

My favorite sport is female and my favorite food is beer. Votes: 0

Garp drank the beer and wondered if everything was an anticlimax.. Votes: 0

If you drink enough beer, everything turns in to a bed. Votes: 0

If beer got any lighter you could raise goldfish in it. Votes: 0

Drinking beer in a children's playground is an old Soviet tradition. Votes: 0

A meal of bread, cheese and beer constitutes the perfect food. Votes: 0

Note to self: no matter how bad life gets, there's always beer. Votes: 0

Bud Light....the perfect beer for marketers about to lose their job. Votes: 0

We're just going to go straight beer. No sense in diluting it. Votes: 0

We're wanted men, we'll strike again, but first let's have a beer. Votes: 0

While beer brings gladness, don't forget That water only makes you wet! Votes: 0

Ah, good ol' trustworthy beer. My love for you will never die. Votes: 0

You've got yoga, I've got beer. You got overpriced, I got weird. Votes: 0

There's damsels in distress out there, and we got all this beer. Votes: 0

Hey, I'm for love, not war. How about we have a beer? Votes: 0

You're like a cold beer, darling, on a long hot summer night. Votes: 0

What I envisioned to see was a group of guys drinking beer... Votes: 0

If you can drink beer while doing it, it's not a sport Votes: 0

There is no back label with a story on a beer can. Votes: 0

I've only been in love with a beer bottle and a mirror. Votes: 0

We could be happy if the air was as pure as beer. Votes: 0

I don't care what kind it is, just get me a beer! Votes: 0

And it's one more beer and I don't hear you any more. Votes: 0

Our fans would never waste good beer by pouring it on us, Votes: 0

I don't consider weed to be any worse than having a beer. Votes: 0

Everybody's got to believe in something. I believe I'll have another beer. Votes: 0

In heaven there is no beer. That's why we drink ours here. Votes: 0

What were they thinking? 'It's an alien apocalypse! Quick, grab the beer! Votes: 0

There is nothing in the world like the first taste of beer. Votes: 0

Banks' beer. There's nothing like it! To Brazil. And to Barbados justice. Votes: 0

I like my beer cold, my TV loud, and my homosexuals flaming. Votes: 0

Remember, the best beer in the world is the one you brewed. Votes: 0

By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver! Votes: 0

I'm only a beer teetotaler, not a champagne teetotaler; I don't like beer. Votes: 0

Is beer good for runners? Sure...if it's the other guy drinking it. Votes: 0

I would not have thought of eating a meal without drinking a beer. Votes: 0

I hate smoothies. Because they won't offer Firestone IPA beer as an ingredient. Votes: 0

Life, alas, is very drear. Up with the glass! Down with the beer! Votes: 0

If one intends to make beer from oats, it is prepared with hops. Votes: 0

All I want to do is drink beer and train like an animal. Votes: 0

Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world. Votes: 0

The man who called it "near beer" was a bad judge of distance. Votes: 0

From now on walking is my beer and feeling good is my hangover. Votes: 0

I can't afford no liquor, all I can buy is beer and wine. Votes: 0

Why is American beer served cold? So you can tell it from urine. Votes: 0

I spend most of my money on beer, the rest I just waste. Votes: 0

No soldier can fight unless he is properly fed on beef and beer. Votes: 0

I think all the beer I drank in college created an iron bladder. Votes: 0

I love to have a beer with Duncan "Cause Duncan"s me mate Votes: 0

I was thinking that women should put pictures of missing husbands on beer cans. Votes: 0

Brewers enjoy working to make beer as much as drinking beer instead of working. Votes: 0

Where does one not find that bland degeneration which beer produces in the spirit! Votes: 0

Well that's the nicest thing a beer induced hallucination has ever said to me. Votes: 0

its difficult to dislike a man who takes pleasure in giving away free beer. Votes: 0

Why beer is better than wine: human feet are conspicuously absent from beer making. Votes: 0

All other nations are drinking Ray Charles beer and we are drinking Barry Manilow. Votes: 0

If they had built the Energy East pipeline to transport beer, we'd be okay. Votes: 0

I was at a bar nursing a beer. My nipple was getting quite soggy. Votes: 0

Czech beer in bottles is the corpse of real beer in a glass coffin. Votes: 0

I sat at a bar having a beer trying to hold down the stool. Votes: 0

All the buildup and hype, everything else, is foam. The game is the beer. Votes: 0

I'd like to have a beer-holder on my guitar like they have on boats. Votes: 0

Whiskey and beer are all right in their place, but their place is in hell. Votes: 0

They can have my beer when they pry it out of my cold, dead hand. Votes: 0

Raise up your glasses against evil forces; Whiskey for my men, beer for my horses. Votes: 0

Why should I paint dead fish, onions and beer glasses? Girls are so much prettier. Votes: 0

Drinking really cold beer is like slapping yourself in the face with an ice pick. Votes: 0

Veblen once asked a religious student the value of her church in kegs of beer... Votes: 0

I'm celebrating my love for you with a pint of beer and a new tattoo Votes: 0

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is Freedom, in water there is bacteria." Votes: 0

If I saved all the money I spent on beer, I'd spend it on beer. Votes: 0

There's nothing better than having a bottle of beer in your hand in the waves. Votes: 0

How much disgruntled heaviness, lameness, dampness, how much beer is there in the German intelligence. Votes: 0

I sat backstage and had a beer with Richard Chamberlain, Paul Newman, and Princess Grace. Votes: 0

The mouth of a perfectly contented man is filled with beer. -Egyptian proverb, c. 2200 BCE Votes: 0

I'm Allergic to grass. Hey, it could be worse. I could be allergic to beer. Votes: 0

We should thank God for beer and burgundy by not drinking too much of them. Votes: 0

I'm not much of a beer drinker, you know what I drink? Peach wine coolers. Votes: 0

What else is there to do in college except drink beer or slit one's wrists? Votes: 0

Who am I, why am I here? Forget the question, someone give me another beer. Votes: 0

Life isn't all beer and skittles; few of us have touched a skittle in years. Votes: 0

What else is there to do in college except drink beer or slit one's wrists~? Votes: 0

Even on the Serengeti, it ain't a barbecue if there ain't some kind of beer. Votes: 0

Paintings are like a beer, only beer tastes good and it's hard to stop drinking beer. Votes: 0

Nothing gives a sensation better than a beer! Nothing builds a relation better than a beer! Votes: 0

Basically I am a low-culture person. I prefer watching baseball with a beer and some meatballs. Votes: 0

Let me finish my beer." (Stark) "Of course. The end of the world can wait.(Kasabian) Votes: 0

Most Americans are born drunk, and really require a little wine or beer to sober them. Votes: 0

I love the Tea Party. They are the ultimate beer goggles. They make everything look better. Votes: 0

Deep-seated preferences cannot be argued about-you cannot argue a man into liking a glass of beer. Votes: 0

Precious to me—it is the Dinner Bell. Oh blessed Bell! Thou bringest beef and beer... Votes: 0

Drinking beer doesn't make you fat, it makes you lean...Against bars, tables, chairs, and poles. Votes: 0

And the commercials would have sickened a goat raised on barbed wire and broken beer bottles. Votes: 0

If you're sad and you like beer, I'm your lady, ... The Saddest Music in the World. Votes: 0

Nature, like Miamonides said, is mainly a good place to throw beer cans on Sunday afternoons. Votes: 0

I wanna get drunk 'til I'm off my mind. One bourbon, one scotch, and one beer. Votes: 0

When the beer is gone, so are they -- flexing their cars on up the boulevard. Votes: 0

Back down a country road the girls are always hot and the beer is ice cold. Votes: 0

And the beer I had for breakfast wasn't bad, so I had one more for dessert Votes: 0

Now son, you don't want to drink beer. That's for Daddies, and kids with fake IDs. Votes: 0

Give me oysters and beer, for dinner every day of the year, and I'll be fine... Votes: 0

On the tour we get a case of beer on the bus every day from Ozzfest. Votes: 0

You can only drink 30 or 40 glasses of beer a day, no matter how rich you are. Votes: 0

Life is with such all beer and skittles. They are not difficult to please About their victuals. Votes: 0

We didn't have steroids. If I wanted to get pumped up, I drank a case of beer. Votes: 0

I've got friends in low places, where the whiskey drowns and the beer chases my blues away. Votes: 0

I'm just worried that there's enough beer on the bus. That's the top priority at all times. Votes: 0

I ain't got no time for a Caribbean cruise, just give me a song and a beer. Votes: 0

We brewers don't make beer, we just get all the ingredients together and the beer makes itself. Votes: 0

Hey bartender, hey man, look here. Give us one more, two more, three more glasses of beer. Votes: 0

And ... and what is civilisation if it isn't people talking to each other over a goddamned beer? Votes: 0

Hardware: This is the part of the computer that stops working when you spill beer on it. Votes: 0

And now, with the aid of this common beer glass, I shall play my fifty guinea solo. Votes: 0

Everything will be okay in the end. If it`s not okay, than there is always beer Votes: 0

I believe in things I can count on, like beer and ESPN and my grandmother's pecan pie. Votes: 0

The house was as empty as a beer closet in premises where painters have been at work. Votes: 0

Prohibition makes you want to cry into your beer and denies you the beer to cry into. Votes: 0

My mind says one thing, but my body says another. Thanks a lot, Indian food and beer. Votes: 0

You might be a redneck if your wife has a beer belly and you find it attractive. Votes: 0

America's craft brewers know that beer, not wine, is the best beverage for accompanying a good meal. Votes: 0

120 million of us place the big bang 2,500 years after the Babylonians and Sumerians learned to brew beer. Votes: 0

Leinenkugels makes better beer now that Miller bought them. It will license insecure people to like craft beers. Votes: 0

I enjoy tasting [beer]. But I'm not a drinker, period. With my schedule, I don't really have time. Votes: 0

There's something sexy about a gut. Not a 400-pound beer gut, but a little paunch. I love that. Votes: 0

If you ever reach total enlightenment while drinking beer, I bet it makes beer shoot out your nose. Votes: 0

Unfortunately, beer was only a short-term answer. And head transplants had yet to be approved by the FDA. Votes: 0

If you guys are going to be throwing beer bottles at us, at least make sure they're full. Votes: 0

I'm 12 years sober, so I don't have beer! When I used to drink I really liked Bass Ale! Votes: 0

Halloween is the only day I can dress up like a hot Latina woman with a beer belly. Votes: 0

Evil is in the face of every frat guy that ever raised a beer cup and went "whoooooo!" Votes: 0

[I normally go-to] whiskey on the rocks. Or a beer. Or with dinner, a glass of white wine. Votes: 0

Cover a war in a place where you can't drink beer or talk to a woman? Hell no! Votes: 0

Yes, sir. I'm a real Southern boy. I got a red neck, white socks, and Blue Ribbon beer. Votes: 0

But a year before that, I was starting to drink beer on the set of the film Lucas (1986). Votes: 0

You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar Votes: 0

If a man ordered a beer milkshake he'd better do it in a town where he wasn't known. Votes: 0

You know the law, Dresden." "He who kills the cheer springs for beer," chanted the rest of the table. Votes: 0

One must be able to say at all times--instead of points, straight lines, and planes--tables, chairs, and beer mugs Votes: 0

I think I'm a girly beer drinker - I like the fruity ones. And the radler has lower alcohol. Votes: 0

Oh, this beer here is cold, cold and hop-bitter, no point coming up for air, gulp, till it's all--hahhhh. Votes: 0

Listen up, you couch potatoes: each recycled beer can saves enough electricity to run a television for three hours. Votes: 0

Americans spend more on beer than they do on books. No wonder their stomachs are bigger than their brains. Votes: 0

We could not now take time for further search or consideration, our victuals being much spent, especially our beer. Votes: 0

I've drank more beer and pissed more blood and banged more women than all you numb nuts put together! Votes: 0

You might be a redneck if your beer can collection is considered a tourist attraction in your home town. Votes: 0

Life ain't all beer and skittles, and more's the pity; but what's the odds, so long as you're happy? Votes: 0

You might be a redneck if you're a lite beer drinker, because you start drinking when it gets light. Votes: 0

VIP Rosé you can have a beer Cuz honey when you gettin money you don't have a care Votes: 0

To me, beer tastes like piss. Maybe that's why I only enjoy it in the shower with my uncle. Votes: 0

Scientists have invented a new strain of cannabis without the high. They celebrated with non-alcoholic beer and furious dry-humping. Votes: 0

What do Jake 'The Snake' Roberts and a beer bottle have in common? They're both empty from the neck up! Votes: 0

I don't think I've actually drunk a beer for 15 years, except a few Guinnesses in Dublin, where it's the law. Votes: 0

That's what's cool about working with computers. They don't argue, they remember everything, and they don't drink all your beer. Votes: 0

I like hot dogs. I like eggplant. I like pizza and creamed corn and beer. But I don't like Arabs. Votes: 0

Drinking beer is easy. Trashing your hotel room is easy. But being a Christian, that's a tough call. That's rebellion. Votes: 0

I learned early to drink beer, wine and whiskey. And I think I was about 5 when I first chewed tobacco. Votes: 0

It is my aim to win the american people over to our side, to make them all lovers of beer. Votes: 0

Buy a man a beer, and he wastes an hour. Teach a man to brew, and he wastes a lifetime. Votes: 0

When you win you eat better, sleep better and your beer tastes better. And your wife looks like Gina Lollobrigida. Votes: 0

It's amazing. Being clearheaded for a show, for starters. Not being reflux-y because of the amount of beer you've drunk. Votes: 0

I could be a dray man delivering the beer, maybe. If they could wangle some cockney in, that would be great. Votes: 0

Here's to the drunken Marine With beer in his canteen! You've heard of the Unknown Soldier But, never an unknown Marine! Votes: 0

I don't understand why a 40 is a quarter of beer when a 40 is 40 ounces. It's time to embrace the metric system. Votes: 0

My first pastoral letter's gonna be a condemnation of light beer and instant mashed potatoes -- I hate those two things. Votes: 0

Bad people drink bad beer. You almost never see an empty bottle of Rochefort tossed onto the side of the road. Votes: 0

The question for me was, could TV actually teach? I knew it could, because I knew 3-year-olds who sang beer commercials! Votes: 0

If you want to see Chris Jericho drink a beer with Stone Cold Steve Austin, give me a doo-a dee-dee-dam, dee-dee-doo. Votes: 0

Of beer, an enthusiast has said that it could never be bad, but that some brands might be better than others. Votes: 0

If a tax on malt would raise the price of beer, a tax on bread must raise the price of bread. Votes: 0

Hysterically funny, amazingly talented people. That's what I think of when I think of Canada. That, and cold beer. And mountains. Votes: 0

Uh oh, it's beer o'clock, I think I'm sober. How about we think this over, over a can of King Cobra? Votes: 0

My goal is to hit the gym every day I'm on vacation. Usually I just end up sleeping and drinking beer. Votes: 0

Marijuana is to rock and roll what beer is to baseball, so imagine if they took away beer at the ballgame. Votes: 0

Ricky Hatton ain't nothing but a fat man. I'm going to punch him in his beer belly when I see him. Votes: 0

Let me assure you that I am not satisfied making $40-$50 million on the same volume of beer (as) CUB sells. Votes: 0

There was no use pretending, no magic left to hear, all the music gave me was a craving for lite beer. Votes: 0

Mensen zijn dom. Op een trommel slaan om een beer aan het dansen te krijgen, terwijl we de sterren zouden willen ontroeren. Votes: 0

I discovered rock'n'roll. You could go round Europe in a van with your best mates, drinking beer, smoking dope and screwing chicks. Votes: 0

I'm not a feminist. I hail men, I love men. I celebrate American male culture, and beer, and bars and muscle cars... Votes: 0

Somehow, we were passing the boundaries of language and finding clarity in shared thought, even if we were just talking about beer! Votes: 0

People can tell what's in beer, eh? Like my brother can tell the difference between beers by what his burps taste like. Votes: 0

Boughs have their fruit and blossom At all times of the year; Rivers are running over With red beer and brown beer. Votes: 0

Don't complain about being unable to afford high-quality local food when your grocery cart is full of beer, cigarettes, and People magazine. Votes: 0

My beer has been universally well-liked beyond my most sanguine expectations. Cannot serve half my customers, and they are increasing every day. Votes: 0

Sometimes it's just the beer and bikinis that get people to come and watch, but it's the competition that's keeping them there. Votes: 0

Things don't make me nearly as happy as talking and having a beer with my friends. And that's something everyone can do. Votes: 0

When you go to a football game and someone offers you a beer [...], they're really saying hi, have a glass of extroversion. Votes: 0

The match would have to be made at 165 pounds. Sean can't make 160 any more, even though he's drinking lite beer these days Votes: 0

I did quite enjoy the days when one went for a beer at one's local in Paris and woke up in Corsica. Votes: 0

How'd you like to gaze at a beer can throughout eternity? It might not be so bad. There'd be nothing to fear. Votes: 0

We may not know who is craft beer but we sure as hell will know what is craft beer by who isn't. Votes: 0

A woman is like beer. They look good, they smell good, and you'd step over your own mother just to get one! Votes: 0

I'm not God but if I were God, ¾ of you would be girls, and the rest would be pizza and beer. Votes: 0

Doesn't matter. If I would've had a beer before the game, I would've been drunk. So I don't believe in 'if.' Votes: 0

Usually, I'm on the bus by now, having a beer and waiting for everyone else. This is cutting into my beer time. Votes: 0

I wish we could all have good luck, all the time! I wish we had wings! I wish rain water was beer! Votes: 0

I found that a couple of bottles of beer would give me a lift, but the third bottle would sober me up. Votes: 0

The egg creams of Avenue A in New York and the root beer float....are among the high points of American gastronomic inventiveness. Votes: 0

The first sip of beer on a hot day is like that first finger-dip when you open a new jar of peanut butter. Votes: 0

I am for the small man who has not forgotten, for the man who loves his beer and his women and his sunlight Votes: 0

Passion, manners, and 80 ounces of beer will win the heart of any woman. And if it doesn't, you'll be too hammered to remember. Votes: 0

I used to drink beer and smoke pot before I played. Now I drink tequila and smoke pot. So it's a little different Votes: 0

Don't quote me on this, but if they ever manage to ban beer advertising in baseball you can kiss the national pastime goodbye. Votes: 0

Good people drink good beer. Just look around any public barroom and you will see: Bad people drink bad beer. Think about it. Votes: 0

the faster it ran away from me. And I found myself reasoning that perhaps one more beer would unlock the doors of perception, Votes: 0

Marijuana is like Coors beer. If you could buy the damn stuff at a Georgia filling station, youd decide you wouldnt want it. Votes: 0

Nothing ever tasted better than a cold beer on a beautiful afternoon with nothing to look forward to than more of the same. Votes: 0

You can now buy a pack of beer containing 99 cans. A 99-can pack of beer. Who says America has lost its competitive edge? Votes: 0

You might be a redneck if you won't stop at a rest area if you have an empty beer can in the car. Votes: 0

Listening to someone who brews their own beer is like listening to a religious fanatic talk about the day he saw the light. Votes: 0

I like writing songs. I like the camarderie of the and. I like touring. I love playing bass. And then there's free beer. Votes: 0

I'm an occasional drinker, the kind of guy who goes out for a beer and wakes up in Singapore with a full beard. Votes: 0

I'm a very feminine man. I like feminine things. I don't go to strip clubs. I don't drink beer. I don't play sports. Votes: 0

I quit smoking. I feel better. I smell better. And it's safer to drink out of old beer cans laying around the house. Votes: 0

The other day, I was so desperate for a beer, I snuck into the football stadium and ate the dirt under the bleachers. Votes: 0

When you paint late at night, drinking beer or wine or both, you gotta be very careful to watch what you are doing... Votes: 0

Obama doesn't seem like a burger and a beer kind of guy. I have to say, I don't find that problematic at all. Votes: 0

A bee rose up from a sun-filled paper cup, off to make slum honey from some diet root beer it had found inside. Votes: 0

It may be healthier to eat beer and franks with cheer and thanks, than to eat sprouts and bread with doubts and dread. Votes: 0

I haven't had a very good day. I think I might still be hung over and everyone's dead and my root beer's gone. Votes: 0

The best way to die is sit under a tree, eat lots of bologna and salami, drink a case of beer, then blow up. Votes: 0

Most people hate the taste of beer - to begin with. It is, however, a prejudice that many people have been able to overcome. Votes: 0

You’re not really an adult at all. You’re just a tall child holding a beer, having a conversation you don’t understand. Votes: 0

The roots and herbes beaten and put into new ale or beer and daily drunk, cleareth, strengtheneth and quickeneth the sight of the eyes. Votes: 0

There's truth in wine, and there may be some in gin and muddy beer; but whether it's truth worth my knowing, is another question. Votes: 0

The most frustrating thing for musicians who want to play stuff from the new album is when everyone goes out to buy a beer. Votes: 0

I was 35 years old and not in the best of shape. I spent many late nights playing music, drinking beer, and eating Taco Bell. Votes: 0

There is no real way to categorize McLean's 'American Pie' for its hybrid of modern poetry and folk ballad, beer-hall chant and high-art rock. Votes: 0

In a study, scientists report that drinking beer can be good for the liver. I'm sorry, did I say 'scientists'? I meant Irish people. Votes: 0

When a glass sits on a table here, people don't wonder if it's half filled or half empty. They just hope it's good beer. Votes: 0

A pleasant aperitif, as well as a good chaser for a short quick whiskey, as well again for a fine supper drink, is beer. Votes: 0

I wish to cry. Yet, I laugh, and my lipstick leaves a red stain like a bloody crescent moon on top of the beer can Votes: 0

No, no, I'm a lowbrow. I read [Dostoevsky] more out of obligation than enjoyment. For enjoyment, for me, it's a beer and the football game. Votes: 0

Yeah, and by the way? How much does it suck that I'm an adult if I kill somebody, and not if I want a beer? Votes: 0

When dealing with complex transportation issues, the best thing to do is pull up with a cold beer and let somebody else figure it out. Votes: 0

The peak of being a fan is a hotdog and a beer and a seat at the game. There's nothing above that. Nothing above it. Votes: 0

I meditate and put on a rubber tire with three bottles of beer. Most of the time I just sit picking my nose and thinking. Votes: 0

It's hard to have any moral authority over a group of drunken college students when you have never had a beer and never been laid. Votes: 0

A broken heart, too much cold beer, ocean waves and a willing man were never a good combination, no matter what the country songs said. Votes: 0

Pink champagne -- that's the kind of life we've both been used to. It might be a little difficult to -- do you like beer? Votes: 0

I did Noise Music because I genuinely liked noise... But a lot of people didn't. At my concerts, people smashed beer glasses in my face. Votes: 0

Whoever drinks beer, he is quick to sleep; whoever sleeps long, does not sin; whoever does not sin, enters Heaven! Thus, let us drink beer! Votes: 0

I'm more of a guy's girl. I like having a beer in a bar, and I don't bicker or sit down and do my nails. Votes: 0

I know I looked skinnier in The House Bunny, but thanks to my diet of beer and doughnuts, I'm back to my fightin' weight!' Votes: 0

I mulled over what he had told me as I savored the Scotch. Not bad, really - like a beer that's been in a brawl. Votes: 0

Liquid oxygen is one of the cheapest manufactured substances on Earth. In large quantities, it costs pennies per kilogram - cheaper than milk or beer. Votes: 0

I'm talkin' about a place where the beer flows like wine, where the women instinctively flock like the salmon of Capistrano. I'm talkin' about Aspen. Votes: 0

Ale, not beer, in a pewter mug was comme il faut, the only thing for a gentleman of letters, worthy of the name, to drink. Votes: 0

I live in Portland now. It's beautiful from day one. The Food and the beer, and no sales tax. Get your iPad while you're here. Votes: 0

Did the Warwickshire militia, who were chiefly artisans, teach the Irish to drink beer, or did they learn from the Irish how to drink whiskey? Votes: 0

I'd tried to straighten him out, but there's only so much you can do for a person who thinks Auschwitz is a brand of beer. Votes: 0

We don't have to go that far to sell our beer because our immediate accounts sell so much. Places that sold 10 cases before, now they're selling 30. Votes: 0

I'm the leader of the platoon and I run gambling and lotteries, dances and I sell beer illegally. I'm a con man and I'm thoroughly lovable. Votes: 0

There will always be another group of kids going to college, drinking beer, and discovering that movie. Many of them have never even heard of SCTV. Votes: 0

In the end, art is small beer. The really serious things are earning one's living so as not to be a parasite and loving one's neighbor. Votes: 0

The baby sits in front of MTV watching violent fantasies, while Dad guzzles beer with his favorite sport only to find his heroes all coked up. Votes: 0

Life isn't all beer and skittles, but beer and skittles, or something better of the same sort, must form a good part of every Englishman's education. Votes: 0

My young friend, I wish that science would intoxicate you as much as our good Göttingen beer! Upon seeing a student staggering down a street. Votes: 0

You write a book like that you're fond of over the years, then you see that happen to it, it's like pissing in your father's beer. Votes: 0

Let a man walk ten miles steadily on a hot summer's day along a dusty English road, and he will soon discover why beer was invented. Votes: 0

Albeit i may die sleep not in the coffen of gold and even beer no fruit; but my impact after depart is my particular to paradise. Votes: 0

I want to go to a place where I can go to a football game, take off my shirt, paint my chest and major in beer. Votes: 0

The battle thing is very important in hip-hop, but at the same time, I want to sit down and have a beer and listen to Rakim. Votes: 0

I just feel like, if I drink, I want to drink a case of beer and not two beers. Two beers doesn't do anything for me. Votes: 0

Give a man a fish and feed him for a day. Give him a fishing lesson and he'll sit in a boat drinking beer every weekend. Votes: 0

I just did an interview where I was asked whether I drink beer or whisky, and I was sad to reveal that I'm pounding spring water. Votes: 0

Around year seven or eight, you'd kill yourself when you realized Norm had to enter and you had to come up with a new beer joke. Votes: 0

I never was a crazy liquor drinker, and I don't like beer that much - though I keep the brews at home because my homies love beer. Votes: 0

If somebody attacks me with words, I'm always like, Do you know me? Do you know me that well? Let's have a beer and talk about it. Votes: 0

If I have a near-beer, I'm near beer. And if I'm near beer, I'm close to tequila. And if I'm close to tequila, I'm adjacent to cocaine." Votes: 0

You can go super American and get barbecue and beer and be like, 'Whatever, I'm watching a football game.' That's exactly what I'm going to do. Votes: 0

Black people drink lots of beer. However, you won't see us skiing down a mountain for one, or see us diving for Frisbees on concrete for one. Votes: 0

A lot of people are actually surprised when I do open up my mouth and smile a little bit, and crack a joke and drink a beer. Votes: 0

Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. Votes: 0

Obviously a lot has gone on, and I feel I am different person, I haven't had a beer since New Year's, which is pretty big for me. Votes: 0

Of course I litter the public highway. Every chance I get. After all, it's not the beer cans that are ugly; it's the highway that is ugly. Votes: 0

Sometimes, I think the only art left for us is slowly peeling the label off a beer bottle while somebody tells you about a dream they had. Votes: 0

I had this beer brewed just for me. I think its the best I ever tasted. And I've tasted a lot. I think you'll like it too. Votes: 0

The food is excellent. The beer is cold. The sun nearly always shines. There is coffee on every corner. Life doesn’t get much better than this. Votes: 0

Oh I have been to Ludlow fair, and left my necktie God knows where. And carried half way home, or near, pints and quarts of Ludlow beer. Votes: 0

I don't want to sound superficial, but when I go see a movie myself, I'd rather look at Tom Cruise than some shmo with a beer belly Votes: 0

Let me just say that it is super wierd throwing your own bash at a conference instead of just leaching off everyone else's, but hey, free beer, right? Votes: 0

This ball was so crowded that it took me - a trained professional journalist with vast experience in this area - forty five minutes to get a beer. Votes: 0

Free software' is a matter of liberty, not price. To understand the concept, you should think of 'free' as in 'free speech,' not as in 'free beer'. Votes: 0

Here with my beer I sit, while golden moments flit: alas! They pass unheeded by: and as they fly, I, being dry, sit idly sipping here, my beer. Votes: 0

Ric Flair is the greatest guy ever. He just wants to hang out, have a beer, and tell stories. He's the coolest. I've never met The Rock though. Votes: 0

Guys you have way too much invested in sport. Guys you are not the tenth man. You're a machine for turning beer into piss that's what you are! Votes: 0

Keep winning and get to the postseason, I won 20 games and they just dumped one beer on my head. It feels good because I'm helping my team win. Votes: 0

Make sure that the beer - four pints a week - goes to the troops under fire before any of the parties in the rear get a drop. Votes: 0

Hell's a dry heat too. It still sucks. Let me know if you pull anything. I'm gonna go get a cold beer and pour it down my pants. Votes: 0

My first open mic, I drank a full pitcher of beer by myself. I wasn't afraid of being in front of people as much as, Is this funny? Votes: 0

What kind of heart does one have to have in order to be able to get rid of these, without regret, as if they were empty beer cans? Votes: 0

I do condition my hair with honey and beer. I smell like the bottom of a beer barrel for days afterwards, but it's very good for the hair. Votes: 0

I want to be able to depict in music a glass of beer so accurately that every listener can tell whether it is a Pilsner or a Kulmbacher. Votes: 0

I am not so foolish as to murmur, if now, since I have drunk up my wine and beer, I have to put up with skimmed milk and sour. Votes: 0

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. Votes: 0

This beer is good for you. This is draft beer. Stick with the beer. Let's go and beat this guy up and come back and drink some more beer. Votes: 0

I don't know what goes on in the crowd. I've had them show up and throw beer cans at me. I caused riots in most of the major cities. Votes: 0

In particular, there was a butler in a blue coat and bright buttons, who gave quite a winey flavour to the table beer; he poured it out so superbly. Votes: 0

My dad's all I've ever had. When I was 3 and 4, my mom used to take me to bars. I understand why now - babysitters cost beer, beer and-a-half an hour. Votes: 0

Many of us wake up at the age of 40 one day, dreading going to work because we were forced to pick a career before we could legally buy a beer. Votes: 0

I ordered a beer and then I ordered another beer, because why finish one when I can finish two? Having only one is great for love, but bad for beer. Votes: 0

So long as a man attends to his business the public does not count his drinks. When he fails they notice if he takes even a glass of root beer. Votes: 0

My voice? Yeah, well, I used to drink a lot of beer when I was a kid and I sounded like a drunk in a choir. I don't drink anymore. Votes: 0

I used to drink a lot of beer, but I was just getting fat as can be. Now that we've had a little success, I can afford to drink wine. Votes: 0

I will be here and be around, watching over you. You can bet on that. I'll find a way to get some peanuts and take some beer and tell some lies. Votes: 0

The attempt to make the consumption of beer criminal is as silly and as futile as if you passed a law to send a man to jail for eating cucumber salad. Votes: 0

I said no to having a beer. I once had a beer with my brother when I was twelve, and I just didn't like it. It's really that simple for me. [pp.37] Votes: 0

I'm a beer man. I tried to drink whiskey and Scotch but I don't get it. It smells like a girl who didn't shower and just splashed a lot of perfume on. Votes: 0

I'm a beer man. I tried to drink whiskey and Scotch, but I don't get it. It smells like a girl who didn't shower and just splashed a lot of perfume on. Votes: 0

It had been a wake-up call and now all she wanted was to keep her dad in sight and make sure he didn't eat too many Mars Bars or drink too much beer. Votes: 0

I can drink on the job if I want to. I can go on stage with a beer and it's OK. I can say whatever I want. It's a great job to have. Votes: 0