Reinvented by Howitzer21Atheist for iFunny :)
"Once I saw this guy on a bridge about to jump. I said, "Don't do
He said, "Nobody loves me. "
I said, "God loves you. Do you believe in God?"
He said, "Yes. "
I said, "Are you a Christian or a Jew?"
He said, "A Christian. "
I said, "Me, too! Protestant or Catholic?"
He said, "Protestant. "
I said, "Me, too! What franchise?"
He said, "Baptist."
I said, "Me, too! Northern Baptist or Southern Baptist?"
He said, "Northern Baptist. "
I said, "Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist or Northern
Liberal Baptist?"
He said, "Northern Conservative Baptist. "
I said, "Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes
Region, or Northern Conservative Baptist Eastern Region?" He
said, "Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region. "
I said, "Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes
Region Council of 1879, or Northern Conservative Baptist Great
Lakes Region Council of 1912?"
He said, "Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region
Council of 1912. "
I said, "Die, heretic!" And I pushed him over. "
-Emo Philips
e ifunnyxo
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