Top quotes by Barry Lyga

And what? Accidentally cuts off three fingers postmortem? 'Oops, oh, no, my girlfriend just died! Clumsy me, in trying to perform CPR, I chopped off some fingers! Guess I'll just take them with me.... Oh, darn, where did that middle finger go? Votes: 17

Disappointment is part of parenthood, Jasper. The trick is learnin' to love your kids even when they disappoint you. Votes: 11

Josh Mendel has a secret. Unfortunately, everyone knows what it is. Votes: 10

. . . but there's a restraining order in place.' She speaks slowly, choosing her words carefully. 'I'm not supposed to be this close to you.' You were never supposed to be this close to me,' I say, and I have no idea why. Votes: 8

He easily gathered her in his arms; Gramma was made up of skin and bones and hate and crazy - and hate and crazy don't weigh anything. Votes: 8

Psychologist: "This, ah, is a new sort of, ah, psychopathology that we're only now beginning to, ah, understand. These, ah, super-serial killers have no, ah, 'type' but, ah, rather consider everyone to be their 'type.'"Gramma: "Did you hear that? Your daddy's a superhero! Votes: 8

...called nine-one-one," Howie was saying, "and then I heard something in the alleyway, so I went back there and" --Howie coughed-- "and valiantly attacked his knife with my guts, to no avail." "Did you get a good look at him? Could you describe him?" Howie smiled wanly. "Yeah. He was about yay long" --he held up his hands, four inches apart-- "thin, made of steel. Pointy. Sharp. Votes: 7

What was the opposite of linkage blindness? What described being certain of something without any kind of evidence?...The term was faith. Votes: 6

This is why I forgive, but I don't forget. When you forget someone, the forgiveness doesn't mean anything anymore. Votes: 5

Medicine cabinets are dangerous. Those doors, man. They'll just spring on you like a ninja. Votes: 5

I don't know and I don't care anymore. I was supposed to have my way for once, just once in my life. I did everything right and I got nothing for it. I want to kill them all. no, better yet, I want to die. No, even bettter than that: I want to kill them all then die. Votes: 4

It's a good day when a goddess gets on the school-bus with you. Votes: 4

He fucked my wife!" George wailed"He ruined my life!""Your wife was a goddamn whore! Votes: 3

I just have an allergic reaction to lung cancer. Gives me tumors. Votes: 3

And my parents made me want i am. So what? We get stuff from our parents, but we also get stuff from the world around us. From people around us. And at the end of the day, we're us. Votes: 3

Cars are little privacy cocoons that we take with us. If you could refuel while driving you could, theoretically, stay moving forever. Votes: 3

Homecoming's stupid." And it is. Buch of kids looking for excuses to grope eachother all night. Votes: 3

Unreal. I'm feeling nostalgic for something that happened less than twenty-four hours ago. This has got to be a record. Votes: 3

I do what I've trained my whole life to do. I watch the ball. I keep my eye on the ball. I never stop watching.I watch it as it sails past me and lands in the catcher's mitt, a perfect and glorious strike three." Votes: 1

...called nine-one-one," Howie was saying, "and then I heard something in the alleyway, so I went back there and" --Howie coughed-- "and valiantly attacked his knife with my guts, to no avail.""Did you get a good look at him? Could you describe him?"Howie smiled wanlyYeah. He was about yay long" --he held up his hands, four inches apart-- "thin, made of steel. Pointy. Sharp." Votes: 1

If I think she' hot and it turns out she's a psychopath, then what does that say about me? I'm totally not ready for that kind of therapy. Votes: 0

Anger was a waste of time and energy. Anger was useless."Anger" was the label given to the emotion that accomplished nothing. Votes: 0

At the end of the day, it's a series of individual challenges played out against a team defense. It's a psersonal test every time I step into the batter's box: Can I do better than the last time? And that's why I love it. Votes: 0

Don't be stupid. You're a child. You don't know what it means to be in love." And she flung open the car door as if she wished she had the strength to rip it from the hinges, and stalked off to the house through the rain. That night, I lay in bed, troubled by what she'd said, blocking out the sounds of argument from my parents' room. Was love what my parents had? Yelling at eachother, worrying about money? Never smiling? Never happy? If that was love, then I didn't want it. Votes: 0

You don't swing at any pitch. You swing at the ones you can hit. Votes: 0

I suddenly realize that I'm naked, which shouldn't bother me since it's the phone, but for some reason it does. "How's it hanging?" Kyra asks and now I think I'm blushing. It's just an expression, but jeez! Votes: 0

One time you told me that the opposite of love isn't hate. And I didn't understand that, but I think I do know. Because if you hate someone, you most still care, right? You have to care a little bit; otherwise you would just ignore them and forget they even live. Or lived. Votes: 0

You can't rely on love. Love will let you down every time. Every. Single. Time. I don't love Jecca. I don't love Fanboy. But... God, the buts in life will kill you absolutely every time, won't they. I don't love. But I need. I can admit that to myself. Votes: 0

Love makes you weak. This I know for sure. Mom loved Roger. Roger loved Mom.And look what happpened there. She died. She thought her love made her strong. She kept telling me-after she was diagnosed-she ket telling me, "I'm going to beat this Kyra. I'm going to come out of it. I love you and I love your father and that love is my strength. You're my strength. Votes: 0

(Man, I wish life had emoticons, you know? So that when your dad pisses you off you could like click a mental button or something and just show him one of those rolleyes. That would rock) Anyway. Votes: 0

Maybe Rachel was right all along. Maybe the past is past, history is history, and you just push it aside and look for the future. Votes: 0

What if a puppet could cut its own strings, and in that act of defiance and strength of will become truly alive? Become is own puppetmaster? Votes: 0

Yes,” Howie said solemnly. “I can teach you how to be more ‘street’”. “For God’s sake…” “Or is it ‘urban’? I can’t remember. Anyway, I can teach you, grasshopper. Or hip-hopper. Votes: 0

They put on fresh gloves and got back to business. Jazz wiped up the blood splatters in the freezer and tossed the tissues in with Howie’s waste. It bothered him that he was leaving evidence behind without some sort of oxygenated bleach, those blood splatters would still show up under Luminol. Of course, the odds of anyone deciding to spray down the morgue freezer and switch on an ultraviolet light were pretty minimal, so it’s not like it was evidence that anyone would ever find or use. Still: Billy Dent’s First Commandment was “Thou shalt not leave evidence. Votes: 0

It's like this," he'd explained once to Connie. "If someone gave you a single rose, you'd be happy, right?" "Okay," he went on, "Now imagine someone gives you ten thousand roses." "That is a whole lotta roses," she said. "That's too much." "Right. Too much. But more than that, it makes each individual rose much less special, right? It makes it hard to pick one out and say, 'That's the good one.' And it makes you want to just get rid of them all because none of them seem special now." Connie had narrowed her eyes. "Are you saying when you're at school you just want to get rid of everyone? Votes: 0

Not according to this," Jazz said, taking the report. "No evidence of sexual activity or anything like it." "Well, there's that," Howie said, sounding relieved. Jazz wondered at that - was it really so much better to be unmolested, but still murdered in a horrible fashion? To die in pain and terror, stripped, left in a field, your fingers cut off? But as long as you weren't raped, well, that was alright, then? Did it really matter at that point? Votes: 0

The best revenge is living well, my dad told me once. Votes: 0

It just means that if someone hates you, they still have feelings for you. If they really didn't care about you, they'd just forget about you. They wouldn't even waste the time hating you. Votes: 0

In baseball, when you get into the batter's box, that's it. It's just you. It's one man against the world. All that matters in that moment is your individual achievement and your individual skill. There is literally nothing that anyone else on your team can do for you. Hell, they're all sitting on the bench, waiting to see what happens, just like the fans in the crowd! It's just you and your bat. And the ball. Votes: 0

Yes, pain meant life. But the symmetric property did not apply; Life did not mean pain. Votes: 0

Fear can keep you alive. The trick is not to let it overwhelm you. Not to let it rule you. If you’re afraid, that’s the universe trying to tell you something. Get away. Don’t run; don’t panic. Just pick up and walk out, calm as you please. Panic makes you stupid. Votes: 0

Sometimes hope could be the most frightening thing in the world. Votes: 0

We humans have the capacity to wreak horrors on each other. But we also have the capacity to survive those horrors. Votes: 0

See, forgiveness doesn't happen all at once. It's not an event - it's a process. Votes: 0

I’m a complicated man, with complicated taste buds. Votes: 0

Look, my dad has a saying - we'll burn that bridge when get to it. OK? You get it? Worry about tomorrow, tomorrow. Votes: 0

Here’s the thing about baseball-it’s not the individual sport I thought it was. Turns out I was wrong about that. Yeah, the batter is a lone man against the world. He stands in the batter’s box like a soldier and it’s up to him-and him alone-what happens next. But here’s the thing I didn’t understand until I was forced to, until recently: In order to hit a home run… Someone else has to pitch the ball. Votes: 0

And I think of nothing. I think of nothing but Rachel. What happens next is pure magic, and is for us and us alone. Votes: 0

You don’t break up with someone just because of an argument, Josh. At least, I don’t. Votes: 0

It's not an easy choice, but that's OK. Easy doesn't equal good. Difficulty doesn't equal bad. It's just life, is all. Votes: 0

And it's true. It's so true. All those years of loving Zik because he never asked about Eve... I never realized, I never understood. It was his job as my best friend not to ask. But it was my job as his best friend to tell him without being asked. Votes: 0

We can know what love is. It´s adults who have forgotten, so they cling to their poor substitute and yell at kids who dare to live with real love. Pure Love. Love without compromise or distraction. Votes: 0

Anger and hatred, when left unfed, bleed away like air from a punctured tire, over time and days and years. Forgiveness is stealth. Votes: 0

You and your scars. Please! You don't kill youself like this!" I gesture, holding a wrist turned up to the ceiling, then pretending to cut across it with my other hand. "That's just a cry for help. That's just attention. Everbody knows that. Cutting across just gets you to the hospital. That's just from movies and TV shows and stuff like that. You didn't really try to kill yourself. you just wanted attention, but you screwed up. Try harder next time. Votes: 0

A river of images and thoughts and feelings, dirtied and polluted so that no one could drink from it without gagging. Votes: 0

...She's not buying [the lie], but there's nothing else on the shelves. Votes: 0

He moved to run a hand through her cornrows, then pulled back remembering the one time he's tried that-Connie had lectured him on the Eleventh Commandment: Thou shalt not touch thy black girlfriend's hair. Ever. Votes: 0

You won't even know you've crossed the line until it's way back in your rearview mirror. Votes: 0

Jazz spent a chunk of the day fantasizing about ways to kill his grandmother, plotting them and planning them in the most excruciating, gruesome detail his imagination would allow. It turned out his imagination allowed quite a bit. He spent the rest of the day convincing himself--over and over--not to do it. Votes: 0

[She] was made up of skin and bones and hate and crazy, and hate and crazy don't weigh anything. Votes: 0

Jazz hadn't given her many details of exactly what life in the Dent house had been like, but he'd told her enough that she knew it wasn't hearts and flowers. Well, except for the occasional heart cut from a chest. And the kind of flowers you send to funerals. Votes: 0

Are you stalking me, Mr. Fulton?" The idea both amused and horrified Jazz. Votes: 0

I do what I've trained my whole life to do. I watch the ball. I keep my eye on the ball. I never stop watching. I watch it as it sails past me and lands in the catcher's mitt, a perfect and glorious strike three. Votes: 0