Top quotes by Judy Gold

Of course I love cooking Eastern European food because I'm a Jew, but I also love making roast chicken. I love making Hungarian goulash. There are a lot of egg noodles in my cooking. Votes: 24

I live on the Upper West Side of Manhattan. I live in a 950-square-foot apartment with one bathroom and two sons. Votes: 18

When Joan Rivers walked through the curtain on 'The Tonight Show,' nobody in my house was allowed to utter a sound. Her gait was full of pep and purpose and her voice unmatched. Votes: 18

I would love to get married, first of all, from my children's perspective. People don't think of children when they think of gay marriage, but I do have children, and for them to see their family validated as other families are validated and protected by our government, yes. Votes: 15

Women are taught that if you want to be a lady, keep your opinions to yourself and be polite. Votes: 14

Joan Rivers broke down barriers, advocated for free speech, and never apologized for who she was. Votes: 14

When you see another tall woman on the street, you nod, sort of like Orthodox Jews. Votes: 12

Women risked their lives for the right to vote. When I hear people say, 'Oh, I'm not gonna vote,' I just wanna tear their heart out. Votes: 10

My partner and I had our first son in 1996, and the office became the baby's room. Our second son was born in 2001, and the office became the kids' room. Votes: 9

I love being a Givenik Ambassador. Not only does it give me a platform to discuss my favorite charities, but I get to talk about my other favorite topic - 'The Judy Show!' Votes: 8

I have decided now that my mother should be the GPS woman, don't you think? That would be fantastic: 'Make a left in 11 miles. Get over now - I want you to be prepared. Turn right on Elm Street, I want to see if Myrna Rosenblatt is still alive. Make your second left by the Dairy Queen. Don't go in, they're anti-Semitic.' Votes: 6

I love standup, but not the grind of traveling and dealing with club owners. Votes: 6

I worked at Military Media, an advertising agency for military-base newspapers. Don't ask, I won't tell. Votes: 6

I do believe that it's something that we don't talk about, but when there are clearly defined gender roles, it is much simpler. Because you don't have to think, which people apparently don't like to do. Votes: 6

I love the vulgar. I kind of have the humor of a 17-year-old boy. Votes: 6

Remember the phrase - 'Act your age, not your shoe size?' That didn't apply to me, as they were the same until the age of 12 when my feet stopped growing. Votes: 5

I try to win the love and approval of strangers, since it didn't work with my family. Votes: 5

My desire for my own sitcom began as a little girl - I spent hours lying on my belly on the shag carpeting getting lost in the world of the '70s sitcom. All I wanted to do was run away to the Brady house, The Partridge Family bus; even the project on 'Good Times' seemed better than Clark, NJ. Votes: 5

As scary as it was being raised by one Jewish mother, I have to feel for my kids because they have two Jewish mothers. Votes: 5

My two sons are the biggest pigs - always dirty, sweaty, burping and farting. Votes: 4

My mother loves it when I talk about her. Half the time, I think she says things that she knows will go straight into the act. Votes: 4

Halloween is an opportunity to be really creative. Votes: 4

I'm going to be a 'Chopped' champion. Votes: 3

When I got a part in 'All American Girl,' in 1994, I remember thinking, 'Now I have a series, I'm not going to need to do standup,' but every night I'd go out afterward and get onstage somewhere. Votes: 2

I've done stand-up since I was 18 years old, and I absolutely love it, but I used to go onstage, and the audience was my peers. Now I go onstage, and I could be their mother. Votes: 2

I always dreamed of living in N.Y.C. Votes: 2

My doctor said I had OCD. I couldn't believe it. I had to call him nine times to make sure. Votes: 2

If you're going to hit a car, try to be sure that it's not a cop car Votes: 1

My Shabbat dinner is not to be reckoned with. Votes: 1

We all know showbiz isn't easy, but being a comic - especially being a female comic - can be quite punishing. Votes: 1

If I was married to a man, and I had the same life situation that I have, it's the perfect recipe for a sitcom. Votes: 0

My mother is a tall woman - as is everyone in my family. At her prime, she stood 5 feet 9 inches, which is quite unusual for a woman born in 1922. Votes: 0

Mother humor is such a universal theme. I wrote a show called '25 Questions for a Jewish Mother.' I had people coming up to me after the show saying, 'I'm Baptist, and my mother is just like yours.' Votes: 0

Comedy is the most palliative way to make a point. People are more willing to listen if they can laugh. Votes: 0

It's fun to be someone else. Votes: 0

If I wasn't true to myself, I couldn't live with myself. Votes: 0

The first time I did stand-up was on a dare. Votes: 0

Twelve years ago my mother gets her cataracts removed. So twelve years ago the doctor gives her these enormous sunglasses to wear to protect her eyes from the sun for 4-6 weeks after the operation...twelve years ago. She still wears them. She thinks they're attractive. She looks like Bea Arthur as a welder. Votes: 0

What if obese people couldn't get married? Votes: 0

We never talked to each other in my family. We communicated by putting Ann Landers articles on the refrigerator. Votes: 0

I have a nice little house in LA. Well, the bedroom is nice. I have French doors in the bedroom. They don't open unless I lick them. Votes: 0